Look at the little heathen baby. He speaks Spanish, but right now all he does is cry. Well, too bad. He shouldn’t have come into the country illegally.

His parents, you know, “the invaders,” are being held somewhere else. I don’t know where. Who the hell cares?

You know, it’s really the parents fault. If they really cared about the kid, they wouldn’t have dragged the baby Hey Zeus thousands of miles into our country where he isn’t wanted.

We had no choice but to follow the law, which requires us to take the kid away and hold him in a room with dozens or hundreds of other baby heathens. We’re doing this because we’ve got this this long complex and secretive process that we follow because, well, we are a nation of laws, dammit!

He might need water or food or medical care. We don’t know. If he wants something, he should learn English. This is America.

What you don’t seem to understand is that we aren’t babysitters. We are protecting our country and our way of life from his kind. If you don’t understand the threat, I don’t know how to explain it to you.

You’re clueless.